In my “about” i said that this blog is about my love life as well. I’m starting to write one. So this post will be about my love story, it’s kinda awkward actually sharing this personal story of mine, but i really want to be a little more extrovert in here. So if you guys don’t like this lame-lousy-sorta creepy kind of topic, just pass it. I totally understand:)
Well, where to start????
Gosh, I never thought it would be this hard! It just many things came to my life.. bad, good, sad, happy, joy, tears, and i don’t know where to start because i’m scared i can’t stop then…
Okay,
I’m Ade and I’m not good in love, or should i say, not lucky enough? no no, my friend (you know who you are!) told me to be more optimistic, so I’d say it just not my time yet. I always wonder to meet my “one” at a very cute circumstances like those dramas do. Such as, in a cozy lounge, i’m here, he’s there, we do our stuff but sometime our eyes bump each other. Then, we just know, realize, that it’s not a lust, it’s our moment, so he greet me, casually.. and I put a smile, a simpe smile, even my cheek start blushing….Okay, I better stop it, because the rest will be our story (and i start feeling weird of what i’ve written;p)
It’s kinda hard for me to get close with someone (boys or even girls), for me, it’s hard to trust people, not because of themselves, but it just me and what inside me. I don’t want people around me see the real me, the weak me, the unconfident me. I want to be seen as a strong young lady and always controllable.
This makes me look fake and it’s not good. I can be a very controllable girl, the most understanding one, the nicest girl ever in front of my friends, but it turns to be 180 degrees different when I be someone’s girlfriend. This happened not for no reason. I just found someone to lay on and i don’t want to be strong in front of him, I want to be a spoiled girl (on my own way), to be “undressed” . Apparently, it always didn’t work, and my boyfriend became freak out, hahaha cos suddenly his girlfriend become the next britney spears (the stress part). But, I tried my best to work on my relationship, it just… didn’t go well.
Now, I’m here, single and happy….
my closest friend, my loveable boyfriend is just my laptop:)
cheers,
ade
